Jackie's Story Jackie is an American who now lives in Gloucester, UK, with her British husband. She is 43 and has no children, but comes from a large family. Having struggled with SA all of her life, Jackie tried getting help from a psychologist. When this didn't work as she hoped, Jackie found the CBT tape series provided by the Social Anxiety Institute, and hasn't looked back. Since completing the therapy, she has attended the three-week CBT course run by Dr. Richards in Phoenix, and has run a CBT workshop in Bristol.

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How has SA affected your life? Jackie: I have suffered from SA as long as I can remember. All through my life it has severely hindered my schooling, career and personal relationships. My parents were rather strict and judgmental and I always felt that I somehow didn't meet their expectations. SA, for me, meant I could not be comfortable with my peers in school or at work. I always felt I wasn't good enough, smart enough and I didn't fit into any group. I experienced a lot of negative feed-back from class and work-mates. I knew I seemed distant and weird, but I couldn't be myself and I didn't like myself enough to want to show my true self to anyone. As a result, I jumped from job to job and felt desperate to leave as soon as people started to see my discomfort and shyness. The only place I felt at ease was at home with my siblings, and this was my sanctuary. I seldom went out and had few friends. It was very lonely and depressing, especially during my teen years. When did you decide to get help? Where did you look for it? My lowest point was probably 1993, when I was working at a local newspaper, and again I could feel that people were starting to see my anxieties, even though I worked hard at hiding them. I knew I couldn't leave this job (I actually liked the work I was doing and had bills to pay), and so I actually considered suicide. Miraculously, soon after, while at my lunch break, I was reading our newspaper, when I came across an article on Social Anxiety. I had never heard of it before, but like most people when they find out, I felt a tremendous sense of relief just knowing that I had an identifiable disorder. I wasn't just a misfit, a weirdo, I really had a recognized emotional illness and it wasn't my fault! I didn't tell anyone, but I booked an appointment with a psychologist. She confirmed my suspicions and diagnosed me with Social Anxiety Disorder. It was actually a bit frightening to make the appointment, but what was the alternative? After all, I had considered ending it all. How bad did it have to get before I plucked up the courage to try to help myself? Unfortunately, she seemed to know less about SA than I did (which is often the case). This is not a put-down on her. The disorder had only been recognized by the psychology profession in 1988. After 10 sessions I decided to look further for help. It wasn't until 1998 that I found a web-site which took me in the direction I was searching for. It was the web-site of a Dr. Thomas Richards and he, having suffered from SA himself, had founded the Social Anxiety Institute. Here was a qualified psychologist who had devoted his practice entirely to Social Anxiety Disorder. I found his web-site informative, helpful, hopeful and best of all...he had actually overcome SA himself. I wrote in several times and contributed my story to his then daily e-mail journal. After much discussion with my husband and much consideration, I sent for his tape series "Overcoming Social Anxiety Step-by-Step". Tell us about the progress you have made... What successes have you had? The Social Anxiety Institute tape series uses Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) as a way to overcome SA. I began to feel better after about the third "lesson". I felt I had found the therapy of choice in dealing with this terrible illness. I started to see how irrational I had been, how programmed I was to always think and react in the same old destructive way. Slowly, I began to change my thinking around. That is the clue to it all...our thinking and beliefs. After completing the tape series, I made a really big investment and attended Dr. Richards' three-week course in Phoenix, Arizona at the Social Anxiety Institute. This experience helped me understand how to work the behavioral side of the therapy and thus completed the picture for me. Now I had the tools to work with. I was not 100% cured yet, but I had a really solid base to work from and the knowledge I needed to change my life. I can honestly say I feel much better than I ever have in my life. I am more confident, relaxed and positive than I could have imagined 10 years ago. I ran a one-day CBT work-shop in Bristol last summer and thoroughly Enjoyed it. Me? Run a work-shop? I would have NEVER believed it just a short time ago. Set-backs come, but they do not last as long as they once did and I now know set-backs are a part of the healing process. What advice do you have for others? I would tell my fellow sufferers, remember that there is hope! Do not go down as low as I did at my lowest point. Things are so much better now that there are lots of people out there to help, including professionals and average folks alike. SA is a recognized, diagnosable and curable disorder. At the present Cognitive Behavioral Therapy seems to be the best therapy to deal with Social Anxiety. I would strongly urge those suffering to try to find help.

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